Valentine’s Day is Friday. Some associate the holiday with joy and love, but for others, disappointment comes to mind.

Bankrate found that typical adults in relationships plan to spend an average of $152 this holiday. That includes the gifts, maybe dinner and some form of entertainment.

Younger adults have even higher spending expectations. Bankrate’s survey found millennials expect to spend an average of $208, 37 percent more.

“I don’t think that the real thing we want anyway is the stuff, even though we might think it’s the stuff,” said psychologist Dr. Randy Kamen. “What we really want is to feel and I say this in honor of Valentine’s Day, is to feel loved.”

Dr. Kamen says you should keep expectations in relationships realistic.

“If we could sort of let go of that attachment, which so often has to do with commercialism and what other people are doing and getting and receiving,” said Dr. Kamen.

Dr. Kamen says communication is key. She added that couples are better off focusing on what they have instead of what they don’t.

“Take the pressure off of the relationship because what would you rather have, a present or a relationship?” said Dr. Kamen.

The Bankrate survey also found more people were disappointed by a lack of thought than how much was spent on a gift.